Well, it’s been a while since I wrote anything here and I can’t say that things are particularly swell or anything. It’s getting cooler, which is nice, and several people left the shelter which means there are plenty of shifts up for grabs which I have availed myself of, so I’ll be able to dig myself outta the financial hole I was in and possibly get the offspring something for Christmas.
I have officially started seminary – I haven’t finished my BA, but they’re letting me take one class as a non-matriculated student. I gotta say, I am not impressed. Earlier today, I cheated on a quiz that included a question about the distance from Jerusalem to Jericho. Now, the Jerusalem-Jericho road is somewhat noteworthy, having been mentioned by our Lord and Savior in the parable of the Good Samaritan, Luke 10:25-37, but the length of that particular route is not part of the parable because it doesn’t fucking matter. Sorta like how the elevation of the peak of Mount Tabor doesn’t fucking matter. Even if these bits of trivia did have any actual value, the information could just as easily be transmitted in a community college-type setting. There is no reason whatsoever that I, or anyone, should have to jump through the hoops required by the ELCA to get ordained. Unless, of course, it’s really about supporting the institution(s) involved.
It’s one class. I’m trying to keep my head around that. Maybe there will be some useful information at some point in my seminary career, but either way, I’ma keep on with it. Unless/until the Holy Spirit tells me to quit.
One of the folks who left the shelter was doing the job I do, as well as serving as office manager at the shelter office. I waited a week, so it didn’t look like I was trying to jump into the spot somebody just left, and then mentioned to my boss that I’m interested in learning more and the office manager position might give me some skills. She said they didn’t want somebody doing both – trying to avoid burnout and keep the roles separate. Makes sense – the person who was doing both didn’t do both for long and is no longer with us. The boss said she wanted me in the shelter, but would consider me for the office manager job if I really wanted it. I said I didn’t want to leave the shelter. I do think I need to get some of the office/administration knowledge and experience in order to go on to do what I think I’ma be doing in ministry, but I ain’t ready to stop working directly with the poor, blighted unfortunates quite yet. The education that I need to do the work I believe God is leading me to is happening here at the shelter.
So, I might as well do seminary while I’m getting educated. I’m planning on sending the ELCA HQ occasional reports about the time and money they’re wasting on making people get graduate degrees and then subsidizing same, but I doubt it’ll matter. The institution will sustain itself, no matter what I have to say about it. It’s only been a month or two since I informed them that I think the requirements for ordination are an unnecessary burden. I’ll wait ’til the end of the semester to bother them again.
Somebody on the Twitter twittered a question, “How do you conceptualize your own death?” I responded something like “Death means I won’t have to put up with American capitalism anymore”. And that’s been a lot of my mood lately. I have entertained some fantasies of moving to Iceland or Finland or Germany or any northern European social democracy – or Canada, for feck’s sake – but I’m not exactly in a position to do that, even if I had any skills that any of those countries would find desirable in an expatriate seeking citizenship. Shit, I don’t have the money for a passport application fee. I’m pretty much stuck here in the American Empire for life. And I am no longer able to convince myself that anybody who has any chance of getting elected at any level has any interest whatsoever in doing anything other than grabbing as much money as they can for themselves. The Democrats sure as shit ain’t gonna help anybody.
Death is how I get outta this shithole. And I might as well rack up a pile of debt, because they won’t be able to collect it.
This hasn’t been a happy one, but it hasn’t been dishonest either.
Luther von Wolfen 